"one thing i truly knew -- knew it in the pit of my stomach, in the center of my bones, knew it from the crown of my head to the soles of my feet, knew it deep in my empty chest -- was how love gave someone the power to break you.
i'd been broken beyond repair."
- stephenie meyer, twilight

i'm almost halfway through with the book. i reckon i'll be done with it by at most 3AM tmr. and i'll have to live with my eyebags/rings on the first day of cny cos i just wont put the book down. its getting a little sad in here. more than a little, actually. very, very sad. sigh.
edward left. he left with the cullens. he left bella behind. point is, he left. its really heartbreaking, heartwrenching - i mean, their love was (almost) perfect, please. he left her but he will never truly leave her (in a sense). somehow he still lingers, and his voice appears to direct her when she's in the most difficult or dangerous circumstances.
it was really like, suck-in-air-to-stop-you-from-crying-kind-of-sound when he said this:
"and i'll make you a promise in return. i promise that this will be the last time you'll see me. i wont come back again. i wont put you throught anything like this again. you can go on with your life without anymore interference from me. it will be as if i'd never existed."
stupid man, how will that be possible. and poor jacob, i dont know whats happening. he's just like this drug bella is feeding on to keep her mind off edward, to heal the pain. but i think love doesnt work that way - you cant simply replace cos each is different, no matter what. you dont use someone to forget someone else. its totally unfair and, well its just, not how true love works la okayi. wait a min - bella didnt think she would have liked jacob this much. she just found comfort and solace in him. like, he was her personal sun. she didnt think that she would actually need him after a while. gahhh, i want edward to come back. i feel that they belong together. this is idealistic love, and such ideals should work out. i hope stephenie meyer doesnt let her readers down. i want to read on to a happy ending. yes i shall continue burrying my head in new moon.
and oh boy, i'm soundly amazed by how much a book can affect my emotions. i really am sad, you know. laugh, please.
*cries*
and i'm starting to have my very on views and perspective on love. nflueeeenza books, tsk.

ciao.